January 2, 2018 Hebrew Educational Alliance
Warren Toltz — A story of a son and a father
Thank you all very much for being here today, your presence honors the life my Dad, Warren Toltz lived over 88 years in Denver.
My role is to help us better understand and appreciate Warren as a father and a son from a historical perspective. Dad would be proud to know I’m speaking about history as he always encouraged me to consider teaching history, occasionally sending me a morning text such as “what are we going to do about that idiot in the White House?” followed by “you’d be a great history teacher!”
He loved discussing history and current events, put great value on staying well-informed. He had the WSJ delivered every day for his entire adult life, plus Denver’s two daily papers, plus the New York Times and was a regular NPR listener who also touted ’60 Minutes’ as one of his favorite weekly shows. Always determined to stay well-informed, stay current, stay engaged and stay active. And he loved discussing world events, political developments and how they were rooted in the history of the 20th Century.
This was part of why he maintained life-long meaningful friendships and had deep respect for Gov. and Dottie Lamm, Mayor Webb and Wilma Webb, and his dear friend Mayor Federico Pena and of course Cindy Valasquez who became, due to Dad’s subtle yet effective promotion, Cindy Valasquez Pena.
When I consider these relationships developed both when these leaders were in and out of office, it speaks to two of Dad’s defining qualities — his inquisitiveness and his sincerity. Other speakers today will I’m sure elaborate, but what lies at the root is the example set for Warren by his parents, Israel and Frieda Toltz, who were first-generation Coloradans born here around the turn of the century.
Some of you may remember by grandfather Israel Toltz — a person who created and set the standard for Dad’s life along with Dad’s mother Frieda Radetsky Toltz both of whom hailed from Denver westside families. The core of Dad’s sweetness grew from both Frieda and Israel as did his central value of love of family.
In his very early years Dad was given the Yiddish nickname ‘Vev’ short for ‘Vevul’ which translates as ‘sweetie’, which I’m sure he earned by being a sweet little boy.
Frieda and Israel were part of the first successful generation of Denver Jews who created and built businesses around Colorado and were central participants in the founding of important institutions that continue to thrive today. They were part of the generation who knew that being Jewish in Colorado was not a ticket to acceptance by major institutions and that anti-Jewish bias kept them locked out of certain neighborhoods, social clubs, hospitals, and Denver society. This was the reality of pre- and post- World War 2 Colorado and thus the centrality and sensitivity to the struggle for civil rights was ever present in Dad’s life.
Dad’s early involvement with the Anti-Defamation League and very close relationship with longtime leader Shelly Steinhauser, led Dad to his broader interest in building cross-cultural relationships with progressive political leaders like the Lamms, Webbs and Penas.
Just to share a quick story on how Dad and Mom came to know Gov. and Dottie Lamm back in the 70s. Dad really hadn’t been involved in political campaigns but was consistently asked to contribute so he met activists via fundraising.
One day the Colorado Democratic Party held a fundraiser Dad couldn’t attend so my brother and I attended on their behalf. It was an auction/fundraiser and one of the auction items was dinner at the Governor’s Mansion with the Lamms.
Steven and I knew, that was perfect gift for Dad and Mom, so we made sure to win that auction and presented them later with the certificate.
I will never forget the night they returned from their dinner with the Lamms at the Governor’s mansion — it was one of the first and only times I actually saw my Dad ‘star-struck’! They were so taken by the graciousness, intelligence and stimulating conversation of that night that a lifelong friendship resulted.
One other quick but revealing story to share about how Dad became acquainted with Mayor Pena. In the 1983 Denver Mayoral elections, Dad was supporting his friend Denver DA Dale Tooley, whom I am sure he got to know, admire and respect via ADL. You will remember that Tooley had run previously trying to defeat Denver’s longtime entrenched Mayor Bill McNichols, but had been unsuccessful and yet he was trying again.
Dad served on the Tooley campaign finance committee and was an active participant in the campaign until a big surprise took place, when a young Denver Hispanic state legislator by the name of Federico Pena beat Tooley and faced a run-off against Mayor Bill. We know the result of that historic election and Dad was so touched and impressed when Mayor-elect Pena reached out and asked him to serve on his transition team. Dad was truly surprised and genuinely honored to be asked. He grew to love and respect Federico and delighted in their lifelong friendship.
The work he did on the Pena transition team led to other important contributions Dad was asked to make. He jumped into support for the new convention center, airport and baseball stadium along side many of his friends from Denver’s Jewish community. He was especially pleased to be asked by Mayor Webb to serve on the board of Denver’s Health and Hospital committee which allowed him to participate in that renovation as well, the stewardship of the growth of Denver General which became Denver Health, another way he participated in Denver’s growth into a world class city. He loved nothing more than spending time with Mayor Webb on the Platte River
I think Dad’s proudest civic achievement was the naming of the new Denver Health emergency wing after Rabbi Emmanuel Lederman, the Toltz family rabbi of the Hebrew Educational Alliance who himself became a committed participant in Denver’s civic life, building bridges to other minority communities in the way only Rabbi Lederman could.
Israel Toltz was instrumental in bringing Rabbi Lederman to Denver, and Frieda and Israel Toltz made sure the Ledermans were warmly welcomed into Denver’s westside Jewish community. My grandparents were such stalwart supporters of the Alliance that the chapel is named to honor the memory of all their contributions.
As the child of Frieda and Israel Toltz growing up on Denver’s westside, Dad formed deep and enduring friendships with many of his peers who became founders and leaders of Jewish community institutions and causes. They did what was demonstrated by their parents, as their responsibility to their fellow Denver Jews, and as citizens of Denver, Colorado and as Americans. I have always thought that living up to the example set by Israel Toltz — both his personal qualities and his civic commitment — was at the very root of Dad’s values.
In Denver’s westside the entrepreneurial Jews created and nurtured service businesses, many had their beginnings below Federal underneath the viaduct. Papa’s sister ran a small grocery store where Dad and his best friend — 1st cousin Pacey Barron — provided delivery service, when they weren’t getting into trouble.
The westside businesses were nearly all service businesses where figuring out how to give good customer service was the competitive advantage that allowed them to succeed and grow.
From those early years Dad learned the importance and value in giving good customer service, which he practiced personally when running Dependable Cleaners over his 35 year career there. He never stopped learning how other successful service businesses practiced excellence, and he was so proud to have attended Harvard’s small business program in the early 1980s.
I have often thought when observing Dad’s special relationship with service providers from all walks of life — of what he learned on Denver’s westside. And service providers — whether they were Dependable employees, caregivers or people he came into contact with — always realized that his approach to them was sincere on a personal level.
Pacey Barron was the first of Dad’s great loves, until the second came along 5 years later when Dad’s sister Roberta (Berta) was born. You will never see a more beautiful brother-sister relationship than the one Dad and Berta had over the past 83 years.
The other love of Dad’s early years was his cousin Shana Radetsky who was the oldest daughter of Dad’s Aunt Ann Green Radetsky Toltz, who lived and raised her family in Kansas City. Dad loved to tell the stories of riding the train to Kansas City to spend time with his cousins, most especially Shana who left us way too young.
Our family counted themselves very very fortunate when later in life after losing her husband –Aunt Ann and Israel Toltz found a beautiful love and remarried. Dad always felt that having Aunt Ann in Denver was a very special gift to us all and he relished the beautiful relationship she had with Israel Toltz.
Today, we are thinking of all these special people who touched Dad’s life and helped him become the person so many considered a special friend.
Of course the other love of Dad’s life is his wife of over 65 years, my Mom Ruth Toltz. In a classic story of West meets East, Dad and Mom met when Dad crashed an eastside Denver party, a 19 yr. old Ruth caught his eye and ‘rocked his world’ as we would describe it today.
They formed a very loving couple and partnership which only grew deeper and stronger facing life’s many challenges. At the root was the deep and abiding respect they both felt for each other, along with their determination to live up to the example set for them by their parents.
Today we are saying goodbye to Warren Toltz by recalling his unusual and special qualities and most especially all of the people who meant so much to his life. He loved us, he cared about us, he wanted to know all about us and that is why we will always remember him.
In closing I want to encourage you to come to our Shiva one afternoon over the next week, and share your story that defines Warren Toltz’s legacy for you. We want to hear those stories, which will help remind us that while we are burying Dad’s body today, he is no longer physically with us on this beautiful earth — the meaning of the way he lived his life remains within us.